The Expendables (review with Spoilers)

[Afterthought]

The Expendables is a movie filled with so much testosterone it's at the later stages of puberty. Every action star in the past 20 years (except JCVD and Seagal for some reason) is in this film and they only do 1 of 4 things. Beat some ass, shoot somebody, go on a knife parade, or crack some decent one-liners.

The film starts out with killing pirates, and then you wonder when the ninjas and robots are coming in. Sadly, that never happens as the merc's decide to take another job from us humans. Strangely enough, we get an "Arnold" cameo, who apparently had time off from running California to be in the picture.

The new job involves overthrowing your standard evil dictator running his island for the drug trade type of deal. What you then also see coming: the dictator's daughter and Stallone's character get all mushy inside. aw. Go back to more Stone Cold cameo time, snap out of it. There is some actual acting in this (hard to believe, but watch Mickey Rourke's character) despite all the "boom boom pows" and brother do we get a lot of "boom boom pow".

This is the film equivalent to Counter Strike because there are a LOT of:
"Boom Headshot"
Shank goes the Knife
Para rushing
Grenade throwing
"The Bomb has been Planted"
Quick draw the pistols

Despite all the explosions and what not, the one-liners make it a decent watching, and there might be a possible sequel, so who knows? 8.2 smashies.

[OPIE]

I saw this movie yesterday and will say AT hit the review dead on.

JCVD actually got a call from SS ( I feel like using initials! ) to be in the movie. JCVD pretty much said he didn't do it because SS's sales pitch sucked. SS: "You're going to make a lot of money." JCVD "I'm an arrogant prick who won't be in your cool ass film now just because you think I will make a shit ton of cash." The film was better without JCVD...I really never liked him as an actor....lets face it....he isn't a good actor...he's just really good at martial arts...but Chuck Norris could still kick his ass.